Vegans Trying to Ban ‘Bring Home the Bacon’ and Other Timeless Phrases

Should saying “bring home the bacon” be banned? At least one academic this week thinks so, considering it might offend vegans.

And that’s not all – “killing two birds with one stone” and “beat a dead horse” could also go by the wayside.

According to Shareena Hamzah of Wales’ Swansea University, this kind of old saying might be offensive to animal lovers. And it’s not just one liberal professor that thinks this. Apparently, animal rights group PETA already believes saying “take the bull by the horns” is offensive and should be replaced by “take the flower by the thorns.”

If only we were kidding.

According to Dr. Hamzah, the increasing popularity of veganism is raising awareness on this front in all sorts of ways.

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“If veganism forces us to confront the realities of food’s origins, then this increased awareness will undoubtedly be reflected in our language and literature,” Manzah told The Conversation, an academic website. “The increased awareness of vegan issues will filter through our consciousness to produce new modes of expression.”

“She added: ‘The image of ‘killing two birds with one stone’ is, if anything, made more powerful by the animal-friendly alternative of ‘feeding two birds with one scone’.” Similarly, PETA would like to get rid of “to flog a dead horse” and replace it with “to feed a fed horse.”

Where does the PC madness of reinventing the English language end?

In fact, here’s a whole list of sayings PETA wants to scrap and their suggested alternatives, according to the UK’s Mirror:

Out: Bring home the bacon

In: Bring home the bagels

Out: Let the cat out of the bag

In: Spill the beans

Out: All your eggs in one basket

In: All your berries in one bowl

Out: Open a can of worms

In: Open Pandora’s box

Out: Flog a dead horse

In: Feed a fed horse

Out: Hold your horses

In: Hold the phone

Out: Killing two birds with one stone

In: Feeding two birds with one scone

Out: Taking the bull by the horns

In: Taking the flower by the thorns

Out: More than one way to skin a cat

In: More than one way to peel a potato

Out: Be the guinea pig

In: Be the test tube

There’s no end to this nonsense once you go down the PC rabbit hole. Not to mention, there are far more harmful things someone could do than use an old-fashioned saying.