It’s been one year since the former Tonight Show host Jay Leno was granted a conservatorship of his wife Mavis Leno after she was diagnosed with dementia. Now, Jay is opening up about why he felt that it was important for him to be his wife’s caretaker himself.
Jay Stays True To His Vows
For Jay, it’s all about staying true to his vows.
“When you get married, you sort of take a vow: ‘Will I live up to this? Or will I be like a sleazy guy if something happens to my wife, I’m out banging the cashier at the mini mart?'” Jay, 75, said while appearing on In Depth with Graham Bensinger. “No, I didn’t. I enjoy the time with my wife. I go home, I cook dinner for her, watch TV and it’s okay.”
“It’s basically what we did before, except now I have to feed her and do all those things,” he added. “But, I like it. I like taking care of her. She’s a very independent woman, so I like that I’m needed.”
Jay went on to say that “you have to find the humor” in any given situation in order to get through hard things. One thing that he and Mavis have done in the wake of her diagnosis is use flashcards to go through old memories. While this would make some people sad, it has actually brought the Lenos a lot of laughter.
“It’s kind of fun,” Jay confessed. “I go, ‘Honey, that’s President Obama. Remember we had dinner?’ [She’ll say], ‘Oh, not me.’ [And I’ll say], ‘Yeah, honey, that was you!'”
Related: Jay Leno And His Wife Mavis Leaning On Their Christian Faith As She Battles Dementia
A Difficult New Dynamic In Their Marriage
Even so, Jay admits that Mavis’ dementia diagnosis has created a difficult new dynamic for them after 45 years of marriage.
“Well, that’s the challenge, isn’t it? When you have to feed someone and change them and carry them to the bathroom and do all that kind of stuff every day,” he explained. “It’s a challenge. And it’s not that I enjoy doing it, but I guess I enjoy doing it.”
“I’m not just, ‘This person is attractive and sexy,’ and having sex with them and everything,” he said of having a partner. “At some point in my life, I’m gonna be called upon to defend myself. I think that’s really what defines a marriage. I mean, that’s really what love is. That’s what you do. I mean, I’m glad I didn’t cut and run. I’m glad I didn’t run off with some woman half my age or any of that silly nonsense. I would rather be with her than doing something else.”
Related: Jay Leno’s Wife Sometimes No Longer Recognizes Him As She Battles ‘Advanced Dementia’
Jay And Mavis’ History
Jay and Mavis first met in the 1970s, when he was performing at the iconic Comedy Store. They went on to marry in 1980. They never had children together, but they’ve been devoted to one another ever since.
In January of 2024, Jay filed for conservatorship for Mavis. It was then that he revealed that she’d been diagnosed with “advanced dementia.”
Dr. Hart Cohen, Mavis’ neurologist, said in a filing at the time that Jay is “such a nice man and treats [Mavis] like gold.” He went on to describe Jay as being “a standup guy” whose “private persona matches the public persona he projects.”
Ronald Ostrin, Mavis’ court-appointed council, said that his client “consents” to being in the conservatorship. He added that she “sometimes does not know her husband, Jay, nor her date of birth.” Dr. Cohen agreed, saying that Mavis also “has a lot of disorientation, will ruminate about her parents who have both passed and her mother who died about 20 years ago.”
Jay was eventually granted the conservatorship.
In the crazy world of Hollywood, it’s rare to find a star that takes his marriage vows as seriously as Jay does. God bless him for stepping up to care for his beloved wife when she needs him the most!
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