BJ Penn
PHOENIX, AZ - JANUARY 15: BJ Penn prepares to fight Yair Rodriguez (not pictured) during the UFC Fight Night event at the at Talking Stick Resort Arena on January 15, 2017 in Phoenix, Arizona. (Photo by Christian Petersen/Getty Images)

Hawaiian fighting legend BJ Penn was able to make his legend grow even more at UFC 237 last night, despite being so far over the hill that if he were to turn and look back, he wouldn’t even be able to see the hill.

You see, Penn set a new UFC record. After battling fellow old man Clay Guida for three rounds, Penn earned yet another “L” – which, at seven in a row, is the longest losing streak the Octagon has ever seen! Hooray for BJ!

Ugh.

Sadly, Penn was somewhat competitive in the first round. But his gas tank was pretty much gone after that, so Guida moved, punched him, moved, kicked him, repeat as necessary.

The former lightweight and welterweight champ got dropped, and was struggling to stay upright in the final minutes of the fight. Penn made it to the final bell, though.

Someone please – PLEASE – stop Penn from fighting. He’s going to die in the cage.

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